This weekend, Matt and I are in California. Matt has JJC rehearsal. It's really nice outside - comparable weather to May or June back home. I brought a plethora of homework, and have plenty to do (especially in regard to archaeology), but I haven't accomplished much. Aside from reading a couple pages of archaeology and looking for a few more articles for my psychopharm paper, I've begun surfing the net for content for our poster symposium at the end of the semester for family financial management. I'm quite excited about the topic my group is doing - Saving money while preparing for baby. We intend two parts - pregnancy and birth; and once baby is here. As I read all this stuff (which is so up the alley I would love to take), I keep thinking about how much I want one of my own. I'd like to implement what I'm learning! lol But I don't know how long it will be before I get to, if ever.

Then I think about getting our own house in Phoenix this summer - and getting to paint and creating a home of our own. All things I wish I could do now. Quite honestly, that's all I want to do (at least I think so at this moment), is fulfill the traditional role of womanhood - give birth, raise children, and take care of the home. Working, even in my chosen field, doesn't really appeal to me. (Granted, I'm sure to most people that working isn't appealing.) I am also pretty sure that Matt doesn't think the concept is very fair. "You want to sit at home while I go to work?" Yes, yes I do. It wouldn't be fair at the moment, but if we were to have kids, I think it would totally be fair. Not like raising children is an easy task.

I'd like to try my hand at homemaking. Currently, I don't really cook. Things in a box I can do, but doing things from scratch and doing meal planning and menus is beyond me. A hopeful example is my cousin's wife. Recently on her blog, she said she couldn't cook at all when she got married, and the dinners she would prepare weren't very exciting. However, after they had their first child, she was able to quit work. With this extra time, she tried her hand at cooking, and found that, not only does she enjoy it, but she's pretty darn good at it. I'd like to think the same could be true for me. When we move, I will hopefully have more time to try my hand at all these homemaking things, even if I have to work (there won't be homework to worry about).

I also bribe Matt by telling him the house would be cleaner if I got to stay home ;) It's probably true. With nothing else to do, what could I do to feel accomplished during the day? I'd like to think that I would take more time and start exercising again (especially before we had kids). My goal is to buy a treadmill once we have space for one. I really miss having one. You see, there's no way I'm gonna go run outside where people can see me, and I'm not going to pay for a gym membership either.

I don't know. Maybe I'm just being selfish. You're the man, you go out an work all day while I hang out at home. Maybe I'd try it and find it wasn't for me. Maybe I need to at least work part time at something. (Let's see how many times I can use the word "maybe" lol) *sigh* For the moment, anyway, it seems the only thing to do is read, dream, prepare, and keep working. In the next few months we'll get to these things and then I can actually DO something!

(April we'll look at houses! I'm really hoping we find one we like and can make an offer. I would love to get into a house as soon as possible, even if I do have school through June. Maybe I'll get lucky and have like a once a week class? That'd be sweet.)

Anyway, less than an hour until today's rehearsal is supposed to end, I suppose I really should try to read some archaeology.